People are treating me inappropriately and only getting personal if I have a problem with them.  Is something funny?

But I had it so good.  Why did things change?

Here I am.  Is there some problem with some people?

So, why is my mom turning on me?

The people monitoring me in private are being mean, I think, cuz I still keep getting upset.

Should I forget about this nonsense.  They won't stop.  I'm treated badly.  They keep calling it off.

People think they were told to punish me for no reason by someone I look up to.

Why did people mess with my relationship?

Supposedly, it seems the person I look up to is ruining my life in some ways.  Give and take, huh?

This is stupid.  Is my life over?

Ellen DeGeneres made me treated like I suck from my generation and people followed!

They're still making a big deal out of the person I look up to possibly feeling inappropriate pleasure looking up to and submitting to people, like I'm just trash tho.

So, people are mean to me and try to make the person I look up to feel like they're better.

What's this problem?

They gave the person I look up to to someone else but like I did something, like they're carrying the person now and not me.

I JUST GET PROBLEMS ALL THE TIME FROM EVERYONE

The people monitoring me in private seem to be laughing.

Have you ever done something like that?

So, does everyone do that?

The people monitoring me in private are at me for saying someone I look up to they let feel a release of submission to listening to someone in some inappropriate way like they weren't the same to me and they just all have a party and dope the person I look up to and say I was bad to be upset.

My dad must have been "off his rocker" when I was born, not accepting that I was good.

They keep going out of their situation and being mean.

Supposedly, the person I look up to wants to submit and look up to me so to me they're just a baby.  My mom did it, but the person I look up to might have just done it thru her.

I disliked the people here a long time already.

People keep cheering someone I look up to but treating me like dirt.

I don't know why, but they acted like I was carrying the person I look up to but like I was also in trouble.

My dad is not abusive just to me but the rest of his family, like my mom.  That makes me think he oughta be kept in check somehow.  His mom's not there, he just does whatever he wants, I guess.

My dad keeps trying to act like he's all that in the shadows, hurting people who want to stop him from inappropriately stimulating the person I look up to, for example.  He thinks he's all that and snappish and with looks that kill.

My dad is mad if I try to telepathically stop him from inappropriately stimulating the person I look up to.

My dad or Ellen DeGeneres or my dad's oldest younger sister may be responsible for the exploitation and inappropriate stimulation of the person I look up to.

My dad keeps being mean...

Why didn't this stop?

My dad is still being mean to me and ruining my life.

What's wrong?  I thought it was the dream.

Maybe the facts are so, but why make it a big deal?  I don't get anything outta it, as far as me doing something.

So, why was that a big deal?  Why not forget it?

I'm not feeling it.

Maybe, we should forget about it.

I'm like when a generation shuns too much stimulation from Baby Boomers.  It's because we know they don't have real affinity to our generation.  In some way it seems to connect.

You shouldn't be molesting your children all the time pretending they are other people who get too much of the wrong kind of attention sometimes.

I made a big point in my life that people are being inconvenient about me, just taking away my favorite relationship.

Wow, I wonder if it's exciting to have the world all love you and say you don't have to do anything.

You know this is wrong.

If the person is famous, at least put things in their place, like wherever I was with them.  Life is unfair because of race and generation.

I guess it's okay if the person I like is pleasured, but in the inappropriate ways against me I don't have to care, like I've been lost by whoever does that it feels, hoping it's not the person I look up to.

I guess I need to figure out my options and who said what.  I don't know if I can.

Sometimes, some people flare up and make me feel like it's over.  I don't care.

My therapist doesn't care.  Neither the counselors I've talked to online having much to say about things.

OK, how about this?  Wanna just sit there and talk about how the person I look up to is better than seemingly many other people or yourself?

Hey, ya'll, remember this?

Heaven is when you feed other people, and the opposite is when you can't reach your own food.

So... I seem to have to not be in Heaven anyway, whatever that was.  I don't want to go to a place that does that.


In relation to the person I like being made to be better and better off than me ... is the sin over their fame itself, I just realized.

I can admit a lotta things suck more now but some things got more harmonious.

What if what happened to me happened to the person I look up to?

Oh OK

What am I supposed to do to fix it?

Is that what you mean by making the person I look up to feel better?


Because I'm a success mentally does not mean that this should happen to me.  That's like not getting paid for work.

OK did I lose anything that mattered?

You know how black men can always make you smile?  I'm not sure..

People are ruining my relationship with Germany and giving it to others in my place tho.

Are people just saying the person I look up to doesn't care about me as much? like it's just about that? that which the person said?

The person I look up to wasn't even competing against me.  I don't want to take over the world cuz life doesn't just go that way.  I want lots of people to socialize and get popular.  I can already tell they're well-equipped.  Some might feel too clumsy, but it doesn't mean you should keep exploiting me just to try to prove I'm not worth anything.

So, some of it doesn't matter anymore.

I realize in cultures like France, this stuff "doesn't matter..."

Maybe, these nice people have an answer?

Yea, so many people made a positive decision to help this mess, but still the person I look up to can't see me as before like they said it was important I feel okay about my past life, like it just was too tacky for me.

What's wrong with you gay people!  You want to pick apart my emotions relating to other people?  Ooh!  Were you born yesterday?  You just keep picking, and picking, and picking, and picking.

If you can't tell I disagree, you're very inconsiderate.

They want me to support that I'm nothing compared to this person, like they took on my reputation of success like I didn't deserve it and never had it!

Oh, but the person I look up to still is up in question with things that matter in ways that are overrated.

Even if you stop hurting the person I look up to, "my life will never be the same."

I realize I have other things.  I just wanted to poke at this.  No one said anything about my past life mattering.

Have a taste of your own medicine.

I ALREADY SAID TO HELP THE PERSON I LOOK UP TO BY NOT GOSSIPING ABOUT YOUR SHIT ON US LIKE THAT'S YOUR DECLARED DREAM

Why is this significant?  Is this a normal thing to happen to people??

I can't feel better!  Help!  Someone!

Oh OK

A ha ha very funny , so funny I forgot to laugh

I just wanted to talk about it!  in private via this blog, the people monitoring me in private.  It always turns into a party.

I guess some of it seems to match something about my life symbolically.

What I Did

I didn't care to worry about other people around the world in misfortune.

I'm detaching myself from caring about and liking human beings

Oh, Oh

I'm supposed to still happen if the person I look up to really exceeded me in popularity, like the tortoise and the hare

I just wanted to discuss this in private here, and then the people monitoring me in private had to take action.

I wanted to be nice, but they keep doing this.  I lost what was most important cuza my dad's oldest younger sister...

WHAT IF IT'S REALLY TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was just trashed! like I'm stupid as a person to be liked

Who'd expect that?  I mean, maybe the person I look up to did it just to fit in, like they had to turn to the bad people instead of the good ones, regarding what's going on in the Orlando, FL, area.

Also, I think Ellen DeGeneres singled out the person I look up to, saying they pretend to be bad to help others but are really good, better than me.

A fact may be a fact, but, in some ways, why should I care?  Nothing's in it for me in the process.

THIS PERSON DOESN'T WANT THESE BAD THINGS TO HAPPEN

THAT'S NOT RIGHT

NOW I DON'T MATTER

I don't care if the person I look up to was in fact popular, but I will not accept people who ruined my relationship with them.

WHY DOESN'T ANYONE CARE

They ended AIM and said it meant the person I look up to doesn't care about me anymore.

My life just keeps getting more ruined.  They are pretending I'm being bad.

They won't stop ruining my life!  I want it BACK!  That's MINE!

The people monitoring me in private said they took my relationship and pretended they took it back.

What if they really removed me from my relationship feeling sentimental about my life and did it to my Gramma because the whole world stimulates the person I look up to inappropriately.

They removed my relationship and put my Gramma there for understanding how hard my life has been being exploited.  They said the person I look up to may have done it.

The people monitoring me in private said I can't feel a certain way about how strong someone I look up to is mentally, like I did something wrong.

Someone said I can’t be happy to meet the person I look upnto.

The person I look up to was ferociously made more popular than me so I could never feel more than dirt.

People are ensuring I don’t advance in music and then bow down to others and pretend they are better in a way they are not.  They make it impossible while I’m along the way so far, just to “hit the nail on the head” one more time,  Then, they jud keep exploiting the person I look up to ruin my life.

My life is thrown away like it’s something disposable.

This isn’t supposed to be a problem, like a big thing.  Oh, so now it’s important.

Supposedly, Ellen DeGeneres wanted the person I look up to exploited so they could never relate to me like they care about the hardships of my exploitation and alienation.

I got more lame messages, that the person I look up to will always be up.

The person I look up to could be the same, but people say the fame just got to their head.

It’s like they want other people, famous or not, to reach out to me but instead.

I’m not mad how the person I look up to functions.

It’s not fair to all the people who worry about this each day.

But I am upset about people causing this.

But it’s like the person I look up to said they didn’t care about me anymore in being exploited because they were after for this reason.  No one is being nice and smart about it with me but are mean.  People don’t care and pretend I’m nasty about it.

People are making it worse on their part.

Problem

They’re giving me more problems because I started a Problems blog again.

This is ruining my family life.  I think my dad just got too upset at my mom.

It posts at different times now like they're talking back.

The post posts awhile usually so I have to worry about if I leave soon and it represents me being killed because of the person I look up to being worshiped.

The people monitoring me in private are trying to hurt me more.  I came to post something in my last post and the save button was saved soon.

OK, I get this

all hail the bad people of the world

Is life about making other people unhappy, to you?

The people here aren't all bad, but somehow my life has been stolen from me.

Orlando is made of many animals.

Nothing happened.  You all are a waste of my life.

This isn't important!

They are acting like the person I look up to is abusing me just to get me to post more shit of theirs here.

You can't just have people who are important to me forget about it.

How selfish and what liars you are.

You're the one who looks bad.

How dare you!

I WANT IT BACK

I wanted to forget about it, but it's like they're hurting me or gonna.

It keeps taking longer for the post to post.

Oh, so I don't matter now?

What, is there still a chance?

I already said to stop doing this.

They said the person I look up to doesn't think I'm that great anymore like they were spoiled just to sport this belief.

Don't you have important things to do?

They keep enforcing it, like it's even vital.

They keep acting like I'm someone else.

I'm supposedly the sore loser just because people are being mean, now they say my relationship cares not about me but about themselves only how they used to.

I don't wish to "use" someone else.

Do you like how people were able to eliminate their issue and make someone I look up to not be able to see me in the same way but a worse way?

The people monitoring me in private have their own way of preventing me from keeping my relationship.

People are just making me trash!

I don't look like a happy person, anymore, and I'm not sure why.

What's all that trash talk all over the media?

People keep saying my relationship doesn't care about me and is too good for me suddenly cuz they get attention from the whole world to ruin it for me.

People ruined it for me.

Before, it was important.  Ever since I met someone else and moved on, I wasn't!

People ruined my relationship.

I don't matter and they think it's okay if I'm hurt a lot.

They keep hurting me.

They keep making it look like my relationship is mean to me.

They keep making me do things if I want a relationship, but being perverted and giving up things socially and such.

You can now subscribe to this blog, at the bottom of this blog.

My dad, his mom, and his oldest younger sister keep attacking my having a relationship by doing perverted things to act like they're not that good.

I wonder why it feels like I lost a relationship and it's less likely I will meet or achieve in life emotionally with people.  I think I'm being tracked by my dad, his mom, and his oldest younger sister.  They think I am in trouble, when I shouldn't be...  I don't know what to say about all the people I've met I no longer care about.  I know I still like some people in the world and am holding on to one relationship with someone I look up to.

People are just out to get me.

I don't have some issue with other people feeling good or something in some strange way, but because of a certain time, when Hillary Clinton did not win the Presidency, people have been constantly thinking about the person I look up to and made them feel ways they wouldn't have otherwise.  I've been sorta snapped at by people I know, via the people monitoring me in private.

Who said, "Hey, wait, Christina is worthless.  She met someone she likes.  People are gonna care about her strange experiences."

They keep pretending to convince me the person I look up to "deserves" this because they are older.

People are all excited just that I thought others like me could experience what someone I look up to did, and it was sorta an accidental thought.  They think they caught me in private.  They think that the rules are up to them.

People keep making fun of me if I ever feel something from someone I look up to.  They, however, encourage the person I look up to to feel pervertedly stimulated.  They took from my life!

The people monitoring me in private are confusing me with what they say via when something loads on my computer.

Edit

I edited my last post.

They are always mean to me cuz I threw something on the floor in public when people were all being telepathically mean to me and I couldn't stand it cuz it wasn't fair.

Edit

I edited the order of my last 2 posts cuz the 1st one didn't publish on time.

Why does everyone in the world know about my relationship and my relationship is affected, and it's like they matter and I don't?  My relationship was taking care of it, but then Ellen DeGeneres spread their identity around saying it was better this way, like it had to happen, tho maybe still just mad at me and not knowing what they could do.

My dad's mom and oldest younger sister are sneaky sending mean secret messages to me, like I'm bad, tho they were really mean to me, in private ways.

My aunt was kinda nasty to me, and now they are onto me thinking they're oh so good and like they are the ones putting up with me.

Worried

Since liking someone new, like life goes, the person I look up to is supposedly possibly not themselves anymore.  Also, everyone is trying to look like them who already shares traits, so maybe that's another reason they ended up that way.  I am most worried they are upset for some reason I got into someone else who insulted them and then inappropriately stimulated them and got them to submit in a way that seemed to say I didn't matter, for fun in some way.

People think I'm punished for doing something wrong, when I didn't really do anything especially bad nor compared to others.  I also had a hard life.

This is why they keep ruining my relationship.  Supposedly, they didn't affect the person I look up to, but I'm not really sure, and I'm suffering a lot around other people, especially here in the Orlando area.  If the person I look up to is affected, they could seem very affected.  This was one of the most important things to me, and other people thought they had to take it away, tho in their subconscious they are just ruining it.

They think they can't stop always thinking about the person I look up to to inappropriately stimulate them because someone else will flare up if they don't keep in check, tho before this wasn't necessary...  They didn't heed my warning, to stop making the person out to be like I'm not good enough for them and they just became more exploited so they now and no longer I would identify with being special in certain ways.  The person I look up to can't care about my life because their life was made out to be as it is now, so that I don't feel "the love" and sympathy for my strange experiences, like it's not a big deal anymore even tho it happened.

When I meet someone new, I suffer when I stop talking to them, and my old relationship does not work out suddenly, tho I didn't know before it would be that way.

Sometimes, it seems like everyone is going around telepathically, to some degree in their subconscious at least, talking about someone I look up to to inappropriately stimulate them about the fact everyone in the world identifies them and always has them on their mind.

The person I look up to was supposed to be a relationship I had.  People want to ruin it and see if they can just molest this person.